The Richest Man in Babylon: Lesson 1

I picked up this little book at the library a few days ago: “The Richest Man in Babylon” by George S. Clason, because I had seen it on a reading list somewhere (I’m a sucker for reading lists, both reading other’s lists and making my own).  It’s written in an allegorical style, and while I find some of the language a bit anachronistic, and the claim on the book “the success secrets of the ancients” a bit over the top, if not somewhat misleading (there’s little proof in the book that any research was done to prove that this is, indeed, secrets of the ancients), it offers up some financial wisdom in a much more palatable way than other books that I’ve glanced at or tried to read with little success.

So far, thirty-one pages in, here’s what I’ve gleaned:

A change in thinking is in order.  Well, of course, I knew that, that’s why I’m reading the book, after all.  However, a financial “guru” suggests that one repeatedly tells oneself: “A part of all you earn is yours to keep.”

The “guru” suggests keeping one-tenth of one’s earnings and learning to get by on nine-tenths of one’s earnings.  There’s a lot of talk about lean purses and fattening one’s purse and so on and so forth, but basically the idea is that by slowly doing this, you will build a tiny bit of wealth (which the guru then suggests putting to work, but more on that in another post).

Ok, I get this.  It’s so simple, how can I not?  How difficult would it be to save $58 a week?  I had already set up a transfer of $25 weekly into an inaccessible ING Direct savings account, so what’s another $33?  It’s totally doable.

Since I have nothing but to gain from doing this, starting in September (because the first of the month Nate and I are going to have our first of many family meetings), we will be putting one-tenth of our weekly earnings into the savings account.

Anyone else doing this?  Anyone want to do it with me?

To begin with the end in mind.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want, and how to get what I want, out of life.  This means defining goals and then working toward them.  Which means I’ve been thinking a lot about “how X gets me closer to X goal.”

So, when Nate asked me what I thought about our getting the entire series of “Battlestar Galactica” on DVD (which we’re renting from Netflix right now and in season 4.5), instead of saying, “No, we can’t afford that” (because I’m trying to reduce “can’ts” from my language), I said, “well, I’m not sure how that’s in keeping with my goals.”  To which he replied: “Isn’t enjoying life one of your goals?”  Hmmm…yes.  Absolutely!  So, I’m still mulling it over.

As I’m reforming my habits (and encouraging the growth of positive habits in Seth), I’m finding that many of my habits are not in keeping with the goals I have.  If I’m always in a tightwad mindset, how can I create and enjoy abundance in my life?  If I want to to be physically fit, how does sitting at home tooling around on Facebook achieve that?  (I think my Facebook habit may just be the hardest to break).

Stephen Covey, author of “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, says “to begin with the end in mind.”  I don’t think that means that you can’t enjoy the process (which I think is a matter entirely up to you), but rather, knowing what the end is, will not only keep you on task, but will make those rather unpleasant tasks that you need to complete all the less unpleasant (if you haven’t found a way to enjoy them already).

And it’s not like I haven’t done this before: my time in the Navy is full of times when I ran with a torn ankle ligament or suffered through boring classes on Naval history (although some of this history did improve my limited American history knowledge) or put up with the humiliation of crashing a simulated airplane.  Although I have no wish to be a part of the military anymore, I can look back and see how the discipline brought out the best in me (although sometimes it brought out the worst, too).  How beginning with the end in mind made the doing all the more worthwhile.

So, we’re back to Battlestar Galactica and all it’s glorious and gorious half point seasons.    Do I think owning it moves me toward my goals of financial freedom, abundance and prosperity?  Not really, since the money spent on that can be better spent on paying off some loans (which moves us closer to buying our land, building our dome home, etc).  I can rent them and enjoy them just as well this way, and thus meeting my goal of enjoying life.  Now to see if I can’t help Nate to see this too.

Fitness goals.

I’ve known for a long time that I need to lose “the weight.”  I gained 65 lbs while pregnant with Seth, in part, I think because prior to the pregnancy I was a vegan/vegetarian AND working out pretty hard-core (I was at the gym for about two hours a day, 5 days a week, longer on yoga days – Tuesdays/Thursdays) and my pregnancy was a time when I was encouraged not to worry about weight and eat what I craved.  I craved meat.  I craved Cheerios.  When I got pregnant, I was, on average, running about 4 miles a day.  My goal was to train for a marathon and prove everyone wrong, that a chunky girl with exercise-induced asthma could do it.  Now I’m that chunky girl woman with exercise-induced asthma again.  And I hate clothes-shopping.  Again.  (Unless it’s shoes, of course!)

I’m working on establishing a habit of exercising in the early morning hours.  I’ve decided this because it works for me;  by the afternoon/evening, there is nothing I’d rather do less than exercise.  When I say “early,” I mean, EARLY.  My alarm clock is set for 4:45 am and the classical radio station goes on.  If I’m lucky, I’ll wake up before it even goes off.  It is imperative that I have returned from the gym by 6:15, for that is when Nate leaves for work.  Or, is supposed to, if he’s walking, which he does most days.  All this means that I have to get to bed early, and oh, I do miss my evening hours.  Of course, what I lose there, I make up for in the loss of pounds (three so far, and counting).

This is an exercise in developing discipline, which has been far too non-existent in my life (military service notwithstanding).  I have decided that I no longer want to be out of shape.  That perhaps I’d still like to run in a marathon (maybe the Portland Marathon 2010?).

I’m done with making excuses, exploring the why’s and wherefores.  I know what I must do, and therefore, I’m doing it.  As Yoda says, “There is no try; do or do not.”

So, with all this said, it is my goal to lose at least 50 lbs by Christmastime.  My brother’s having his second wedding (to the same sweet lady, more about that another time) and I’d like to fit into a dress I wore for my sister’s wedding just weeks after I found out I was pregnant.  (Or maybe get a new dress to celebrate the weight loss!)  I am currently 207 lbs, so says the scale in the bathroom (although it’s quite fickle, sometimes I weigh more in the a.m. than I do in the p.m.).  I’ll post a picture of the dress soon!

I’m back.

Seth and I spent a month at my parents’ home in Pennsylvania, visiting with them and my brother and his children, who have lived in Brazil for the past 6+ years.  It was a time of enjoyment and awakening for me.

I had stopped posting because I didn’t really want to write about how I wasn’t following my goals and we weren’t living frugally.  I retreated into a cave of functioning depression.  I needed to get away.  Something to interrupt the habits I’d gotten into.

So, we splurged on two airplane tickets (around $700).  This ultimately resulted in an inability to pay the rent, for which received a 72 hours notice.  This in and of itself was a huge wake-up call to the fact that whenever we have enough money to be comfortable, we don’t really pay attention to where it’s going, and how and when.  I suppose it’s telling that I’m now coming back to my blog now that the GI Bill checks have stopped coming.

The time away was well spent.  My brother suggested that I read “The Secrets of the Millionaire Mind” – his wife had suggested it to him.  I’ve not completely finished it yet, but will be soon – I’ll be posting a review on it when I have.

I learned some things about myself: I’ve allowed my feelings to make a lot of decisions for me; I spend a lot of time thinking in “I can’ts”; I’ve put my dreams on the shelf so that Nate could follow his; I’ve been a rather irresponsible mother to Seth; I’ve got some financial blueprints that need to be examined and tossed out.

I’ve removed the word “Frugally” from the title, because I don’t want to focus on what I have to live without, but rather what I already have and what I’m moving toward.  In other words, living in abundance and prosperity.

Subscribe & Save? You betcha!

Last week I was trying to decide which bulk toilet paper package would be the most economical, and posted my dilemma on my Facebook status.  A friend promptly suggested Amazon’s Subscribe & Save program (S&S).  So, I checked it out.  Since I make an effort to make conscious choices, my toilet paper brand of choice is Seventh Generation, and I was happy to find that many Seventh Generation products are offered as part of the S&S program.  And, I would get much more for my money that if I ordered through my current wholesale co-op.  Shipping and handling is free.

I love ordering bulk.  It makes me feel more secure, knowing that if Nate were to lose his job, or at the very least get sick and lose some days, that we’ve got plenty to last us through to the next month.  It also means less grocery trips AND I get to do what I love, which is online shop (actual, physical shopping of any kind if very draining for me).

I used to think that buying/ordering bulk was some sort of over-consumption gone wild.  This sort of obsession that one of something wasn’t enough, that the more the better.  My worst fears have not been realized, mostly because I strive to make conscious choices; to vote with my dollars, if you will.

I’m still checking out the S&S program, to see what it all offers.  Feel free to leave in the comments something you’re doing to save on everyday household purchases.

How a tiny apartment rescued me from clutter

I’m a pack-rat by nature.  I’ll hold on to empty toilet paper rolls just because there’s a potential craft.  I have a hard time throwing out used envelopes (you never know when you’re going to need to make a list!).  I love books and magazines (although I find that the library helps a little bit with this, the exception being, of course, when it’s an obscure title).  I get distracted, a LOT.  And this was before-kid, so I can’t hide behind that reason (which, believe me, is a very, VERY viable one!).  I have several projects going, half of which I don’t even know I still have going.  I read somewhere that every knitter has about 8 knitting projects going – fortunately, I’m not quite the knitster that some are, and only have 6.

Right now, half of the dinner table is covered with paper stuff: mail, books, magazines, and god knows what else.  Two other shelves and the desk where I sit share a similar fate (also, Nate has a bit of an affinity for what I call dust-magnets or chotchskies).  Oh, and the top of the fridge.  So, I’m not totally rescued from clutter.  However, I’m not totally consumed by it, either.

I have found that the larger the space, I interpret it as a place to put “stuff”.  I’m not sure if this is because, growing up one of 8 children rendered me precious little of my own personal space, or some hereditary gene I inherited from my similarly sentimental pack-rat father (although he’s much more neat with his stuff!).  In any case, learning this about myself has really been illuminating.  I’ve decided that I really LOVE the 747 sq. ft that is our place, mostly because it’s given me a chance to achieve what before now was never possible: a (mostly) clutter-free environment.

Living on such a small, simple level has really allowed us to examine what is really important to us.  It’s not just a move toward economic or environmental conscientiousness.  It’s much more personal than that.  Almost spiritual in a way, as we seek to let go of our attachment to “stuff” and follow a less cluttered path to spiritual growth.

I get by with a little help from my friends

I’m pretty sure I blogged about this once before, in my “early” blogging days, but over the last year, I’ve learned just how vital a good community is!

Despite my extroverted manner, I am actually a bit shy (it’s more a worry that people won’t like me because I’m not smart or hip enough and when I do get talking, there’s definitely a foot in the mouth factor), and making truly good friends has been difficult for me in the past.  But I had resolved that I would make the best of our move last year and that I would find a community to be a part of.  This grew mostly out of the isolation I felt as a stay at home mother on a military base, which seemed amplified when Nate was deployed, as at times, he was my only lifeline.  I also think that there would be a lot less post-partum depression/psychosis if women had a supportive group of mothers surrounding them (or at the very least, someone to catch them on their way down the abyss).  So I formed a mother’s group last fall, and after a few fits and starts, it’s taking off really well.

Part of the goal of this group is to support each other through gifts of service (like child care), as well as bartering and sharing what other skills, talents and things we have.  I have particularly benefited from the child care as well as being the recipient of three pairs of pants, from a lovely friend who lost quite a bit of weight, and wanted to pass them on.  Since my wardrobe has been slowly declining – one pair of jeans has a rip, and the other a rather ill-fitting pair with an outdated pattern on one leg (at $6.99 who can complain?) – I welcomed this gift, wholeheartedly.  It made me think about donating things to Goodwill, which is nice, but then others have to pay for them.  Why not share with a friend?  Heck, give something away to a complete stranger, while we’re at it?!

And then, I can’t go without mentioning another sweet friend who has not only allowed me a plot in her garden, but willingly shared her seeds with me (as well as her knowledge of gardening), and is fine with me bringing my food scraps over to put in her compost (so long as I don’t dirty it up with bread, cheese and meat, :0 ).  So this year, I may not have a patio garden experiment (although I’d love to hear from those who do).

My friends’ acts of generosity really made me want to pay it forward.  It also made me realize that, right now, with what America is facing, community is really what is going to pull us through this mess, not millions of dollars of bailouts to car companies.  It is the encouragment of my friends when I tell them my goals of living a debt-free life, the excitement they share when I tell them how far we are, and sometimes the no-nonsense replies to my excuses for not exercising that allows me to focus on the positive instead of the negative, and when things are tough, help me through a rough spot.  This sense of community seems to be largely lost in a culture that is overly concerned with connection.  If this recession brings about anything positive, let us hope it’s community connections.

Credit Card Debt? Gone!

This past week, Nate finally paid off his last credit card.  What a relief!  We are now Credit Card-Free!  It’s almost been a year since I started blogging and getting our finances under control, and while it was my goal to start 2009 without any credit card debt, 3 months later isn’t too shabby.  I’ve been credit card free since November, myself.  I sort of feel like a member of “Credit Card Users Anonymous” (which, as far as I know doesn’t exist…but perhaps it should?!). Feel free to write/call me for support when you’re about to use it!  I’ll talk you down from that ledge! 

It’s so nice to have another box crossed out on our “Financial Freedom Plan.”  Next up?  Our car loan.  With less than $6,000 left, we should be able to get it paid off by the end of the year.  That’s my goal, in any case.  Of course I’ll keep you posted.

It can be done.

Wealth

Although I strive to “never say never”, I feel that this may be one of those times.  I will never bemoan how “poor” we are again.  Today, I encountered yet another homeless vet on the on-ramp, and having only a mere $1 in my purse, I gave it to him (you have probably read about what a “sucker” I am in another post).  The ultimate irony is that I was on my way to pick $10/gallon raw milk.  The light was red, and he briefly shared his predicament with me.  From Alaska, so the cold nights were not too bad, so he said.  And he needed a kidney transplant.  I know a little how the VA system works, and knew he might die before he gets it.

Seth wanted to know who he was, why I was talking to him, and why I gave him money.  It was the perfect chance to teach him about compassion, although I have to say the experience left me learning more about gratitude than all of the 30 Thanksgiving Days of my life.  It helps that Seth asks a lot of “why?” questions.  “Why is he homeless?  Why doesn’t he have food?  Why can’t he work?”

And here I am, in my relatively new VW station wagon (a 2004), which we still owe roughly $6,000 on, giving him a mere dollar.  I almost went back to pick him up, and cook him a decent meal.  Less out of guilt, and more out of gratitude of what he taught me.  I am not poor.  I have never known what being poor is like.  Not really.  There was a period when I was 6 that we were “homeless” but we went and lived with my Dad’s family in California, still managing to attend a private religious school, and I vaguely remember a trip to a cabin in the mountains.  We always had nice clothes, even if they were handmedowns, we had toys, we had food, we had a roof over our heads.  We had shoes, we had coats.  I’ve only once slept outside and that was in college and by choice (and not very far from my dorm room, either!).  Of course, seeing these guys out there, always drives home the thin line that lies between where we are and where they are.  It’s a fine line for a lot of people these days.

As I was answering Seth’s questions, I said to him, “Wow, we’re really lucky, aren’t we?”  And it does come down to that, in these economic times.  There are people with multiple college degrees who can’t even get a job at the supermarket, and yet we’re sitting here, a decent job, a nice car, our little place, our pantry stocked, toys and books cluttering up every crook and cranny.  How in the world did we get so lucky?  The universe is truly smiling on us.

The High Output, Low Input Problem

Yes, my dear Marianne, I’ve finally decided to tackle this challenge.  It definitely got my creative juices flowing.

Many of my friends have found themselves unemployed, saddled down with debt…if this is you, keep reading.  If it’s not…keep reading anyway, it’s very likely you know someone who is.

Here is the best of what I’ve got, it may seem cruel and heartless, but believe me, sometimes tough love is what is needed.

At this point, you may have to consider that you’re bloody poor.  Welfare poor.  Sign-me-up-for-WIC-poor and give-me-Food-Stamps poor (not that I recommend you do any of the above, you want to maintain your independence and WIC food is not quality).  At this point, you might have to throw “living well” out the window.  Or redefine what that means, in any case.

1. Lower your expenses until they can go no lower.  This may mean getting rid of an extra car (or go car-free, and get a bike).  Moving into a much smaller abode (and when I say much smaller, I’m talking the smallest you can get).  If you have pets, ask someone you know who loves pets to foster them for you while you pull yourself out of the hole you’re in.  Eat less meat, eat more beans, or eat one less meal a day.  Look into gleaning.  Cancel Netflix.  Cancel Internet – go to the library or roam for free WiFi.  Get the lowest phone plan possible.  Shop Goodwill or see if you have friends who would be willing to donate their old clothes.  Learn how to patch up old clothes, darn socks, etc.  Dumpster Dive, especially behind stores/malls – you’d be surprised what you’d find in there (you and some friends in similar straits can plan a “mission” once a week, might be kinda fun!).

2. As to employment.  There are jobs…craigslist seems to be full of them.  At this point, being picky is really not much of an option.  You might have to work at Starbucks.  Or walk dogs.  Or bath elderly people…all for the minimum wage.  It’s ok, you don’t have to do it forever.  It might feel like it, but there’s light at the end of the tunnel.  If you are a stay-at-home mom, who is a little creative and organized, consider doing child care.  Find odd jobs for skills you have.  Go to a temp agency.  Mow lawns.  Deliver newspapers.  Drive a school bus.  Play the piano for church services.  Babysit.  Seriously, this is not a time to be picky.

3. The debt.  First, know what the statute of limitations is on credit cards.  If you haven’t paid for a really long time (like 7-10 years) you may very well be in the clear.  You have to check what the law is for your state.  Second, take the smallest one that you intend to pay off and see if you can’t negotiate both a lower amount and a payment plan that you can manage.  Make a little chart, post it on the fridge, and keep track.  If you have a check coming from the IRS, use it to pay off debt, not to cover living expenses.

4.  Live communally.  Find another family or two, find a reasonably sized house, work out a reasonable food budget, get rid of all vehicles except for one that’s paid off (and get some bikes), and figure out how to put all your skills and knowledge to work for everyone.  I imagine that if another family of three rented a three bedroom house with us in this area (this area being the Portland metro area), we’d only be paying $500 for rent, which would be lower than the $735 we’re paying for our little one bedroom apartment, and it would have the perks of having a yard in which to grow vegetables and perhaps house some chickens.  Having lived in a large family myself (8 kids), I know that we could get by with just one car and a whole lot of bikes.

5.  Be honest with extended family members about what’s going on, tell them that should they give any gifts that do not meet the basic needs of the family, they will be returned or exchanged for ones that do (and when this happens, do it!).  Little Tommy will be better served by spending quality time having dinner at his Grandma and Grandpa’s than getting a new toy truck.

6. Finally, if all else fails, you may need to consider bankruptcy. Don’t worry about what other people think…if they cared so much about you declaring bankruptcy, they might have pitched in to help you before it got to that point.  And, aside from that, it’s probably more about how they feel (perhaps guilty for having it so good, perhaps afraid because it might mean that they are a few steps away from it themselves).  Don’t worry about your credit rating, at this point, it’s probably shot, and quite frankly, it doesn’t really mean anything (watch “Maxed Out” for more information about how credit ratings are determined).

Drastic times call for drastic measures.  This is the most drastic I could think of.  I would be interested in hearing what drastic measures others have taken.  (One frequent visitor/commenter on this blog has moved into an RV -please forgive me if your name escapes me at present).